Showing posts from May, 2017

Alcohol & Chocolate

As I sit here now in the corner of my apartment I'm given flashbacks.

I was watching this same TV show, on the same bed, during the time my life began falling apart.

What do I have to prove my journey since? Alcoholism? Aggressive allergies? Resorting back to my sleeping bag blanket for comfort and sleep?

Tomorrow marks my 27th. If I remember right, it's quarter after two in the afternoon.

I expect to hear from him; if not, no loss. His "bestie" has been pushing for a celebration at work for it. I really didn't want anything and that's part of the reason why I said I don't want cake or any sweets. Get me a fruit tray or allow me to wear shorts to work.

I guess we'll see.

These Are A Few of My Favorite Things

Oddly I don't think I'm going to talk about any of my favorite things in this post. It was just the song playing on the tv at the bar.This is one good thing about the Mix Ultralounge. The music isn't just the same over-played music in the radio today.I mean, right now, they're playing a spoof of School of Rock.Not only that, I don't feel as if there is as much drama here as compared to Martha's; or what I recall it used to be. However, regardless if where I am I'm still not able to find a decent date. I'm looking for someone clean. No drugs, no questionable habits. Hygiene is key! Also, take care of yourself. Don't look like the creepy owner of a windowless van like this guy two seats down from me. Your body is your canvas, too. Don't be just a bunch of blotches on a piece of paper. ...and it's getting too crowded to finish this. Another time!

Fly To Me Angels

Why is it only old guys or teenagers want to talk to me?

Is it that hard to find a decent guy around the same age who just wants to settle down?

I find a lot of joy in just sitting on the couch, soft blanket on top, and watching an old movie. Or holding hands with someone and taking a walk. Talk about your day. Grocery shop. Simple things.

Apparently to be gay, you have to first have a model body. Next you have to have a drive to always be the best or doing something to achieve more.

All fine and dandy, but if you're constantly wanting, you have no time to sit back and enjoy what you have.

That's what I was trying to do.

...and so begins the tears again.

Listen Close

It's been a while and, more than likely, my previous posts are all gone.

...probably for the best.

You're joining me as I dawn a new year in my life. Forgive me if everything is broken and lying on the ground in heaps; pick-up progress is a bit slow.

Between the headaches during the day and the crying fits at night, it's hard to focus.

If you're returning, welcome back. Please note that I'm currently typing this is my half-empty studio apartment, naked on my bed (which is on the floor), while that cat cleans himself in front of the fan.

I've since left the retail life and currently sell insurance in a small office on the south side of town. My Friday nights are spent at the bar doing the only thing I know how to do: attempt to drink away the pain. Saturday and Sunday are spent making circles around town with the hope I'll find something I want to do.

Nasty habit, grinding your teeth. Probably the main reason I have the headaches. It's all I got to figh…