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30 Days of Pride - Day 19 thru 22

19. Share your favorite memory.You're asking me to dig into a amnesiac fog. My favorite memory, and one that will haunt me forever, is when my recent ex sent me a picture message. It was a frog riding a goldfish with the caption: "in a world full of fish, find yourself a frog." Below the message was his text: "you're my frog."20. Share something you love about your significant other - or - how you’re making the most of being single.I wish there was something I could say for being single but sadly nothing much. I'm just trying to enjoy my time and think about me and my health instead of what I used to have.21. How did you meet the last person you had feelings for?That's a great question and I honestly can't remember. All I can remember was that he wouldn't stop pestering me about meeting outside of Grindr. I was angry after a night of work at Walmart and said if he wanted to meet the mess that was me, he could catch me at McDonald's. Sure…

Stand By Me

It's impossible for me to be happy...I've fallen down so far that I don't think I'll ever come up for air. No one can make this DarkShark smile anymore. I had finally got something I longed for since I was little. A lover. A house. A home...For once, I felt myself easing and becoming a better person. But as time passed, I realized it was all a charade. I ended up in a separate room. Eating dinners alone. Taking out my anger on animals. Then bottling it up as I bit the inside of my lip leaving an impression forever. I now wake up, work, gym (maybe), bed. I don't see people. I don't talk to people. I don't socialize. I cry. I cry because it hurts so much to be where I am after making it so far. I had a home. Somewhere I felt safe. Someone, who with a touch, calmed my roughest waters. ...I looked into a personality test recently. INFJ. I am an INFJ. I've never heard of that combination of letters when deceiving a person. But it's me.Someone who is calm…

30 Days of Pride - Day 15 thru 18

15. Name a company that is a positive force in the LGBTQ+ community. I can't say I know one major company that is not in it for the benefit of the LGBTQ+ community who isn't in it for themselves. Here in Springfield, the APO is out to help teach the community safe sex practices and help those who have it rough with home, insurance, etc.  16. Name your best quality. My best quality is my unconditional love. I've been in many situations and have seen many points of view. For that, I apply those to my life for better understanding and compassion for others. But, betray me and I'm not easy to forgive. 17. Share something you’d like to improve about yourself. My physical image. I'm obese in the gay community and average in regular culture. I want to be happy with my body so when I workout, I workout for me to be happy with myself. 18. Name someone you know who inspires you and share why. I can't say that I have really anyone that inspires me, sadly.

30 Days of Pride - Day 7 thru 14

I apologize for being lazy and unmotivated; I'm really trying to work on everything. There are days it's a struggle to get out of bed. But continuing on...

7. Share something about your family or upbringing.
I grew up in a small country town in a family of four. It used to be a happy family with many smiles and laughs. Sadly, the world began turning and things began changing faster than I could hope to reverse.
8. Who is your greatest supporter? That would have to be Amer. Regardless of how hard I tried to push her away in the past, she's supported me through everything. When I had my rough spots and everyone had walked away, she stayed.
9. What ‘tribe’ do you identify with? I have to probably identify with the straight-gays. I don't care about fashion, or celebrity gossip, or drama, or anything of the sort. I just want to live my life with a guy that makes me happy.
10. What is the most influential LGBTQ+ event you’ve attended? I can't say that I have ever really attend…

Love Lost

For a cloudless day, the storm rolled in swiftly. Thunder crashing and rain drops falling like bombs.

Then again, what can you expect when the storm was called...

A flash of lightning reflected in his sapphire eyes. The pain displayed as a single tear runs down the his cheek to gritted teeth.

"No," he growled, his body shaking with tremors. More tears spilling out. He raised up his hand as the air began to pop around him. FLASH! A column of raw energy ripped down the highway, disintegrating several cars in its path.

"I can't," came another growl.

He wasn't able to contain his hurt any longer collapsing to his knees and screaming to the lightning show above. The air cracked but with a chill. A circle of ice shot up from the ground around him and raced outward.

There were no more words; he was gone and the DarkShark remained. His head lowered and his eyes flashed a dark blue color. Pure darkness within his element. The damage he was to reap had only begun wh…

A Break From Our Schedule

Time to Vent!

Relationships suck!

Why, Colt, what ever could you mean by that? I'm not sure; let's break it down!

When I was little, relationships were a big commitment with the impression that they lasted a long time. Long being defined as years, maybe centuries. NOT DAYS OR MONTHS! Now I can't speak for the relationship that pushed me over the edge this morning, but I can expect it to be short.

From the outside looking into a broken relationship it's pretty easy to spot the one who did wrong. Take for instance my situation. One party was distraught and fighting depression, not to mention suicide. The other, proceeding forward with life as if they weren't even inconvenienced. Nightly crying fits and trouble moving forward. Running along the beach with stupid gap-toothed grins.
For the couple I encountered today: one guy was so upset you could hear his voice shaking across the phone and the other MIA.

But, you don't even know both sides of the story. He could&…

30 Days of Pride - Day 6

6. Who was the first person your came out to?I'd like to say that was Amer, but thinking back it wasn't. Her name was Christy in high school. We attended many FFA trips and one day I just came out. I'm not really sure what pushed me to that decision.